24
Sun, Nov

Vegan Protest: Fake Blood and ‘Hey. Hey. No Filet!’

SAY WHAT?

1) Thousands of Swedes are having NFC chips implanted between their thumb and index finger.  The chips can function as contactless credit cards and key cards. These are the same microchips that have been used to track animals and packages. Should the chip malfunction or a programming error occur it might mean Bjorn Faltskog appears to be Rudy the Labrador Retriever, and he's lost and so, incidentally, is his package somewhere in Brazil. Bjorn's credit card transaction is denied and he wonders how and what Rudy ordered that is in a package making its way through Brazil.


2) Well, here's another robot story. London based HSBC bank has added Pepper the robot to its 5th Ave. Branch in mid-town Manhattan. Pepper is four feet tall and asks "How can I help you?" and he pushes credit cards.He can also dance, pose for selfies and tell jokes. We were able to obtain a couple of examples of Pepper's jokes. "So, a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, Why the long face?" Or, "I've checked your account and you have all the money you need if you die in a couple of hours."

3) Summer is here heralding the arrival of mosquitoes. Of course they aren't the problem here that they are elsewhere. In the south some states refer to mosquitoes as their "state bird." A recent study confirmed what scientists suspected that mosquitoes remember the taste and smell of blood. They also remember being swatted and while mocking the swatter, "Hah, hah you missed me" they also steer clear. So, with this in mind, swat often and hope the local mosquitoes think your blood "sucks."

4) Butchers in France have asked the government for police protection claiming their security is being threatened by Vegans. The butchers claim they are trying to impose their meat free lifestyle on the nation. One of the favorite tactics by the Vegans is to throw fake blood on the shops along with graffiti. Also, they will stand outside the butcher shop shouting, "Hey! Hey! No Filet"  

5) Do you ever wonder about the majority of Supreme Court decisions? They are almost always five-four decisions? And the it's always the same 5 judges on the conservative side and the same 4 judges on the liberal side. The only judge that ever seems to switch sides is Justice Kennedy. You'd think once in a while the conservatives or the liberals would change their "opinions." 

(Tom Murphy is a writer, humorist, actor, disc jockey and an occasional contributor to CityWatch. He lives in Los Angeles.)

-cw